razzledazzlefish

Checking out Snap Shots

2008-11-28T16:11:00.000-08:00

Levi's Has A Nectar Hive (a new community)

2008-09-18T11:03:00.000-07:00

Levi's Women Campaign has a community site on StyleHive. If you love levi's or are into fashion check it out.

http://www.stylehive.com/site/us.levi.com/new/grid/0

39 Masterpieces of Creative Advertisements

2008-09-16T19:32:00.001-07:00

inspiration can still be found in advertisements. check these out.

read more | digg story

12-Old Girl Kicked Off Boys' Hoops Team For Being Too Good

2008-09-16T19:27:00.001-07:00

Did I mention that she is a 6-foot, 1-inch 12-year-old from Portland? Oregon State has already offered her a scholarship.

read more | digg story

The Future of UI

2008-08-23T21:21:00.000-07:00

Holographic Interface - round interface - Ringo from Ivan Tihienko on Vimeo.

Get the iPhone GUI PSD

2008-08-21T08:35:00.001-07:00

Ever need to mock up an iPhone app for a presentation. Here, get the PSD that will save you tons of time.

read more | digg story

Flood of Fans Crashes Dr. Horrible Website

2008-08-21T08:29:00.001-07:00

Fans eager to watch the first installment of Joss Whedon's direct-to-web musical Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog flooded the site Tuesday, causing it to crash.

read more | digg story

Bigfoot Found!

2008-08-15T21:16:00.000-07:00

And the 'cooler than thou' competition continues ...

2008-08-07T13:32:00.000-07:00

This ain't no disco, this ain't no foolin' around ... but like any competition, it's kinda fun to watch. A whole site dedicated to the coolest agency creative spaces. Some fairly interesting designs tucked in with the bland stuff.

http://www.aintnodisco.com/

Slingbox coming to iPhone

2008-08-02T09:49:00.000-07:00

TV hits the iPhone soon. Fun stuff, not sure if I'll watch full movies on my iPhone though. Now I am wondering if iTunes be offering steaming rental movies to iPhones anytime soon? Or for that matter, videos from the road at all.

Open-source Openbravo buys your ticket on Portland's public

2008-08-02T08:49:00.001-07:00

Portland is one of my favorite cities on the planet, and today I learned to love it even more. Portland's transportation agency, TriMet, has been using open-source Openbravo POS since 2007 in its automated system to sell tic

read more | digg story

Battle of the Typing: iPhone, Treo, WritingPad, PC

2008-07-23T10:31:00.001-07:00

Paramount to any other features of the iPhone, the lack-of-keypad is what distinguished it from the rest of the market. This feature, however, brought much criticism to the iPhone, for many believed it would be far more difficult to type.

read more | digg story

WHDI: World-changing wireless HDTV to become standard

2008-07-23T10:27:00.001-07:00

Imagine watching any HD video wirelessly from any Blu-ray player, PC, TiVo, set-top box, video camera, Xbox — any video source, anywhere in your house, up to 100 feet away. Now add the ability to instantly control that video from wherever you’re watching it. That’s what WHDI (wireless high definition interface) can do.

read more | digg story

Exclusive: Star Wars: The Force Unleashed for iPhone

2008-07-17T08:49:00.001-07:00

Video footage of a new work-in-progress Star Wars game for the iPhone.

read more | digg story

Live Interactive Cinema Games

2008-06-28T09:35:00.000-07:00

OK, your next trip to the movies may require you to slap on some extra Old Spice and underarm deodorant. WIll this cause more people to make it to the movies on time? Will this be a good branding experience for companies? WIll you participate?

Another Example: (Volvo - World's First Interactive Cinema Test)

Nintendo WII gaming on a 100m2 screen:

Wondering if this would be a way to promote MS Surface.

The $40,000 iPhone

2008-02-21T12:19:00.001-08:00

That's $39,800 after the $200 rebate if you bought it early. A diamond encrusted iPhone... don't show my wife.

Blogged with Flock

What Time Is It? Debt Time

2008-02-21T10:27:00.000-08:00

The National Debt is raising over $1.5 billion a day. Whoa!

Visit the U.S. National Debt Clock

The SQUBA

2008-02-15T13:31:00.001-08:00

Can you believe it? The Swiss want to drive us underwater. Check out what's driving (diving) to this year's autoshow.

Blogged with Flock

Your Story In One Sentence

2008-02-13T20:57:00.001-08:00

Blogged with Flock

Join the AARF Facebook Network Now

2008-02-13T20:51:00.001-08:00

Blogged with Flock

The FWA Hall of Fame

2008-02-13T20:48:00.001-08:00

See the greatest websites of all time.

Blogged with Flock

hello there

2008-02-13T20:34:00.001-08:00

Blogged with Flock

The iProposal

2007-12-26T16:19:00.000-08:00

Dood, this guy takes pride in being a geek. You get an iPhone, an iGirlfriend and and grand iDea and Shazam!

TomTom developing iPhone GPS module?

2007-12-12T10:36:00.001-08:00

Here's a fresh Apple rumor in the run-up to MacWorld: a TomTom GPS module for the iPhone.

read more | digg story

Amazing Animation [PIC]

2007-11-18T20:27:00.001-08:00

just wow... this has to be the best animated GIFs I have ever seen.

read more | digg story

Best Photographer Dad Ever!

2007-11-18T20:25:00.001-08:00

Crossing the desert on the back of a dog, or searching for lost treasures on the bottom of the ocean. Jan von Holleben’s photographs allow children to make their dreams come true. (12 Photos in Total - Click to See Next Button for More)

read more | digg story

holy friggin' realism

2007-11-11T18:30:00.000-08:00

Click and browse, just keep in mind that these images are acrylic paintings.

Free Stock Images

2007-10-22T19:41:00.001-07:00

Stock.xchnge, the leading free stock photography site. Check it out.

High Five

2007-10-20T09:57:00.001-07:00

iPXSync to offer full synching with iPhone

2007-10-16T20:07:00.001-07:00

iPXSync to offer full synching with iPhone, Calender, Phonebook everything

read more | digg story

Adobe's online Photoshop Vs. New .Mac

2007-10-07T08:25:00.001-07:00

When will Apple go public about ActiveSync and the iPhone?

2007-09-29T08:32:00.000-07:00

ZDNet's Mary Jo Foley -- Apple still isn't talking publicly about whether the company has licensed Microsoft's ActiveSync. All I can say is if Fake Steve Jobs says it's true, it must be, right?

Advanced Glow Effects in Photoshop

2007-09-16T19:10:00.001-07:00

In this tutorial we're going to create some really sharp looking glow effects using a combination of layer styles, the pen tool and colour blending. The end effect is quite stunning and hopefully you'll pick up some tips you didn't know before.

read more | digg story

Sketchup

2007-09-11T16:40:00.001-07:00

For those of you who haven't heard of it, go check out Sketchup. It's a free 3D app from Google that is simple and accessible for even non-3D trained peoples. Sketchup is used in Google Earth and has a variety of cool potential applications. A quick run through the tutorial and you can be churning out 3D in no time!

If you get tired of making your own you can check out what others have made at Google's 3D Warehouse.

Technorati Tags: Sketchup, Google, 3D

Heartbreaking works of staggering ungenius.

2007-08-10T10:17:00.000-07:00

Behold.

One. Just one of 50 of the world's worst local commercials.

Want more? Here's the top 50 collection for your viewing pleasure.

the learn list

2007-08-01T14:02:00.000-07:00

The name says it all. A new, simple list of tutorials and how-tos on the web for those applications that we both love and hate...

This Is Just So Wrong

2007-07-31T14:15:00.000-07:00

Mad props to marketing synergy. Guess you can write free checks for a fresh pack after you run out.

Shocking. Head-shakingly shocking.

Star Wars vs. Harry Potter - Death Match

2007-07-28T08:29:00.001-07:00

Who would triumph in a fight to the death? If these Star Wars characters were pitted against the corresponding characters in Harry Potter in a no-holds-barred tournament of magical galactic combat, who would prevail?

read more | digg story

Your Guide to 2008 Presidential Candidates' Positions on Top 25 Issues

2007-07-21T12:20:00.001-07:00

All 18 democrat and republican candidates' positions on issues arranged in an easy to read table.

read more | digg story

1,500 Inmates Practice 'Thriller' Dance

2007-07-21T12:17:00.001-07:00

Awesome video of 1,500 Filipino prison inmates dancing to Michael Jackson's "Thriller". No one can resist the evil of the...

read more | digg story

Microsoft Surface, Watch Your Back! Here Comes MPX for X Server on Linux

2007-07-14T08:17:00.001-07:00

" Peter Hutterer, a PhD student at the Wearable Computer Lab at the University of South Australia, has released a Beta version of his multicursor modification to the X server windowing system under Linux. What it does, in essence, is provide users in a X windows desktop environment like KDE or GNOME to use multiple cursor points on a touchscreen...

read more | digg story

GameTap brings 500 PC games to Intel Macs

2007-07-10T23:05:00.001-07:00

GameTap today announced that it is expanding its offerings to the Mac community by providing Intel-based Mac users access to its Lite Player, which offers more than 500 new and classic game titles as well as more than 600 streaming videos of original programming from GapeTap TV. "Mac users will now be able to enjoy hundreds of games that have

read more | digg story

Mike Spicer Photos

2007-07-02T09:37:00.000-07:00

PAF battle of the bands II

2007-06-28T15:43:00.001-07:00

portland rawk show

2007-06-27T13:54:00.000-07:00

Pictures by courtesy of Cheevers. I'll post more later, when I get them.

-p

pretty money, loaded message.

2007-06-19T13:59:00.000-07:00

Buy the book. Wait, should we really be BUYING that book?!

See more examples...

Have you seen the New York iPhone Commercial?

2007-06-15T21:09:00.000-07:00

I think we need to do a Portland version.

Imagining the Tenth Dimension - A Book by Rob Bryanton

2007-06-14T11:12:00.000-07:00

Imagining the Tenth Dimension - A Book by Rob Bryanton

Bend your mind, Neo, not the spoon! If you want to make your head hurt, check this out.

cool color concept

2007-06-12T09:17:00.000-07:00

Check it out.

when you care enough to send the very snippiest

2007-06-04T10:46:00.000-07:00

Nice e-cards (does anyone really send those anymore?!) that may possibly cause you to shoot milk out of your nose.

Steven Colbert at D-COM

2007-06-02T02:17:00.000-07:00

All geeks must watch. Chocolate cake distributed by fiber, the 5 Steves and a great introduction to this year's DCom convention.

Live Streaming Governorator

2007-05-30T20:45:00.000-07:00

General Electric teamed up with PointRoll and Akamai to raise the bar to provide live streaming video directly to banner ads running on several major portals.

The event, broadcast live last Thursday at Universal Studios in Hollywood as part of the second anniversary of GE's Ecomagination initiative, consisted of an hour-long moderated discussion between GE Chairman and CEO Jeff Immelt and California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger. As the two discussed environmental issues and how they are addressed by both business and government, video of their conversation was streamed to banner ads on AOL, Yahoo and MSN.

Google's New Tool - Trend Tracking

2007-05-22T22:04:00.000-07:00

The trend in searching is to search trends. Check it out to see what to check out.

The psychology of banner ads

2007-05-21T08:42:00.000-07:00

A bit of an eye-opener...

Microsoft is all about the "O"

2007-05-16T20:12:00.000-07:00

Microsoft introduces the Ofone. You just have to see it to believe it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WazA77xcf0A

50 Bullshit Jobs - 1 of 50

2007-04-26T16:49:00.000-07:00

Hhhmmm... I wonder what that job could be?

one-window-web-development app

2007-04-24T10:03:00.000-07:00

I know, that doesn't seem very interesting at first glance. But the app looks like a great conglomeration of all things that a designer would need to code up a site and publish it. Check it out. Besides that, they are local Portland guys and the site is quite slick. Nice job to the Panic guys, yet again (they're the same guys who make Transmit and did Audion).

one of the reasons it wasn't so bad to work for nike

2007-04-19T16:15:00.000-07:00

click happy

2007-04-19T15:21:00.000-07:00

Beautiful and quirky in its simplicity. Just click your way through.

We need this kind of thing in the new building

2007-04-19T13:22:00.000-07:00

Check this out:
In accordance with the launch of Adobe's CS3, this interactive mural installation was designed by Brand New School for Goodby, Silverstein & Partners of San Francisco. Using some fairly sophisticated programming and tracking hardware, peoples' movements are recorded and translated into an animated mixed-media mural that reflects the creative license afforded by the new Adobe CS3 software package. From left to right, the mural evolves from simplicty to complexity as more elements are introduced.

nice tip

2007-04-19T11:02:00.000-07:00

A nice Photoshop tip to save you a little time and automate your process. Lots of other good things at this blog.

ready for CS3?

2007-04-18T13:27:00.000-07:00

How about a video podcast or fifty to prepare you for the impending workflow upheaval?

careful where you put your logo

2007-04-17T09:59:00.000-07:00

Just read the article...

UX

2007-04-16T09:53:00.000-07:00

A great site for all sorts of information. Not sure how long it's been around, but it should have been found a long time ago...

With article titles like Fuck. Love. Brand. and links to articles like 12 Breeds of Clients can you see the relevance?

yum, type.

2007-04-12T16:20:00.000-07:00

whos.amung.us

2007-04-09T09:41:00.000-07:00

Free code that displays how many people are viewing your site, myspace, or blog at that current time. You can even install the firefox plugin and have the counter show up at the bottom of your web browser window to view your popularity while looking at other peoples sites. Of course it can be a little depressing as mine has been stuck on zero since setting it up on my myspace.

do something good

2007-04-06T12:46:00.000-07:00

another inexpensive, good stock photography source

2007-04-06T10:10:00.000-07:00

Lucky Oliver. A fairly new site that has pretty decent imagery. It's also growing quickly, so check it occasionally for updates.

kromotion

2007-04-03T16:28:00.000-07:00

Kromotion:
Fancy French mograph blog... nice and different.

advertising can have a conscience, too

2007-04-02T11:34:00.000-07:00

use live surface to convey your ideas

2007-03-28T09:41:00.000-07:00

A great resource for comping up an idea to show a client. The images have ready-made masks and clipping paths and they are adding new images constantly.

Blue Vertigo - More than resources

2007-03-23T09:58:00.000-07:00

Blue Vertigo

An Argentinian site full of all sorts of wonderful things. Resources, Fonts, Free Stock, Sounds, Photoshop Brushes, Poser Downloads and other Designy Stuff. Really nice.

adidasyourworld

2007-03-20T14:42:00.001-07:00

purdy for your 'puter

2007-03-20T10:51:00.000-07:00

Desktopography. A little sumpin' for making your work life a little nicer to look at...

The Top 10 Things They Never Taught Me in Design School

2007-03-19T08:43:00.000-07:00

The Top 10 Things They Never Taught Me in Design School
by Michael McDonough

1. Talent is one-third of the success equation.
Talent is important in any profession, but it is no guarantee of success. Hard work and luck are equally important. Hard work means self-discipline and sacrifice. Luck means, among other things, access to power, whether it is social contacts or money or timing. In fact, if you are not very talented, you can still succeed by emphasizing the other two. If you think I am wrong, just look around.

2. 95 percent of any creative profession is shit work.
Only 5 percent is actually, in some simplistic way, fun. In school that is what you focus on; it is 100 percent fun. Tick-tock. In real life, most of the time there is paper work, drafting boring stuff, fact-checking, negotiating, selling, collecting money, paying taxes, and so forth. If you don’t learn to love the boring, aggravating, and stupid parts of your profession and perform them with diligence and care, you will never succeed.

3. If everything is equally important, then nothing is very important.
You hear a lot about details, from “Don’t sweat the details” to “God is in the details.” Both are true, but with a very important explanation: hierarchy. You must decide what is important, and then attend to it first and foremost. Everything is important, yes. But not everything is equally important. A very successful real estate person taught me this. He told me, “Watch King Rat. You’ll get it.”

4. Don’t over-think a problem.
One time when I was in graduate school, the late, great Steven Izenour said to me, after only a week or so into a ten-week problem, “OK, you solved it. Now draw it up.” Every other critic I ever had always tried to complicate and prolong a problem when, in fact, it had already been solved. Designers are obsessive by nature. This was a revelation. Sometimes you just hit it. The thing is done. Move on.

5. Start with what you know; then remove the unknowns.
In design this means “draw what you know.” Start by putting down what you already know and already understand. If you are designing a chair, for example, you know that humans are of predictable height. The seat height, the angle of repose, and the loading requirements can at least be approximated. So draw them. Most students panic when faced with something they do not know and cannot control. Forget about it. Begin at the beginning. Then work on each unknown, solving and removing them one at a time. It is the most important rule of design. In Zen it is expressed as “Be where you are.” It works.

6. Don’t forget your goal.
Definition of a fanatic: Someone who redoubles his effort after forgetting his goal. Students and young designers often approach a problem with insight and brilliance, and subsequently let it slip away in confusion, fear and wasted effort. They forget their goals, and make up new ones as they go along. Original thought is a kind of gift from the gods. Artists know this. “Hold the moment,” they say. “Honor it.” Get your idea down on a slip of paper and tape it up in front of you.

7. When you throw your weight around, you usually fall off balance.
Overconfidence is as bad as no confidence. Be humble in approaching problems. Realize and accept your ignorance, then work diligently to educate yourself out of it. Ask questions. Power – the power to create things and impose them on the world – is a privilege. Do not abuse it, do not underestimate its difficulty, or it will come around and bite you on the ass. The great Karmic wheel, however slowly, turns.

8. The road to hell is paved with good intentions; or, no good deed goes unpunished.
The world is not set up to facilitate the best any more than it is set up to facilitate the worst. It doesn’t depend on brilliance or innovation because if it did, the system would be unpredictable. It requires averages and predictables. So, good deeds and brilliant ideas go against the grain of the social contract almost by definition. They will be challenged and will require enormous effort to succeed. Most fail. Expect to work hard, expect to fail a few times, and expect to be rejected. Our work is like martial arts or military strategy: Never underestimate your opponent. If you believe in excellence, your opponent will pretty much be everything.

9. It all comes down to output.
No matter how cool your computer rendering is, no matter how brilliant your essay is, no matter how fabulous your whatever is, if you can’t output it, distribute it, and make it known, it basically doesn’t exist. Orient yourself to output. Schedule output. Output, output, output. Show Me The Output.

10. The rest of the world counts.
If you hope to accomplish anything, you will inevitably need all of the people you hated in high school. I once attended a very prestigious design school where the idea was “If you are here, you are so important, the rest of the world doesn’t count.” Not a single person from that school that I know of has ever been really successful outside of school. In fact, most are the kind of mid-level management drones and hacks they so despised as students. A suit does not make you a genius. No matter how good your design is, somebody has to construct or manufacture it. Somebody has to insure it. Somebody has to buy it. Respect those people. You need them. Big time.

(nicked from designobserver)

New Atlas RM Banners

2007-03-15T10:14:00.000-07:00

Allstate

view demo

Media: Neo@Ogilvy
Creative: OgilvyOne
Format: In-Banner video

Mini Cooper - Hammer & Coop

view demo

Media: BSSP
Creative: BSSP
Format: Expanding Banner

T Rowe Price

view demo

Media: Avenue A | Razorfish
Creative: Avenue A | Razorfish
Format: Expanding Banner

The Riches

view demo

Media: MediaStorm
Creative: BigInteractive
Format: Expanding Banner with video

Viacom is SUING YouTube for $1 Billion+

2007-03-15T09:45:00.001-07:00

The suit seeks more than $1 billion in damages, as well as an injunction prohibiting Google and YouTube from further copyright infringement. The complaint contends that almost 160,000 unauthorized clips of Viacom's programming have been available on YouTube and that these clips had been viewed more than 1.5 billion times.

read more | digg story

Best Geek Hotels in the World

2007-03-15T09:42:00.001-07:00

We've been to plenty of hotels where the TV hardly worked and the Internet connection was spotty. But some properties are on the other end of the spectrum: true Geek Hotels. What does it take to be a Geeky Hotel? Way more than just free WiFi, that's for sure. Being geek is a cultural endeavour, so after searching every henhouse, ..." awesome stuff

read more | digg story

Beer launching fridge

2007-03-13T09:09:00.001-07:00

Wow. Now this is an idea that could pick-up: a mini fridge with a catapult on top and an automatic beer launcher. The cool part is that it's very small and incredibly accurate. Seriously, it's a gadget that I would buy!

The Hole - video powered by Metacafe

read more | digg story

amazing use of a laser

2007-03-12T15:21:00.000-07:00

Microsoft Soda

2007-03-10T12:25:00.001-08:00

A new brand of refreshment [picture]

read more | digg story

Banksy: Greatest Street Artist of All Time? (Gallery)

2007-03-10T11:22:00.001-08:00

Banksy - pseudonym of a well-known yet anonymous English graffiti artist from Yate near Bristol. His artwork are often satirical pieces of art which encompass topics from politics, culture, and ethics. His street art, which combines graffiti with a distinctive stencilling technique, has appeared in London and in cities around the world. [notcot]

read more | digg story

25 Killer Code Snippets Every Good Web Designer Should See

2007-03-10T03:43:00.001-08:00

Round up 25 of the Best CSS, scripts, html and widgets that you can use on on your website or blog..

read more | digg story

Apple Subnotebook (FeatherBook) will run iPhone OS X says Analyst

2007-03-10T03:41:00.001-08:00

"The 'mini' Mac OS X will be used. In terms of software, our sources indicate that Apple is leaning towards using the same "mini" version of Mac OS X used in the upcoming iPhone. We believe this will be particularly important as it has a much smaller footprint and runs with as little as 4 GB of space."

read more | digg story

Harvard Professor: "Apple Generated $400 Million of Free iPhone Publicity"

2007-03-10T03:38:00.001-08:00

"No other company has ever received that kind of attention for a product launch," Yoffie says. "It's unprecedented."...The company's masterful buzz machine has helped generate record profits (thanks to the worldwide digital music cultural icon, the iPod)

read more | digg story

Heroes to Zeroes

2007-03-10T02:49:00.000-08:00

Did NBC produce the recent YouTube spoof "Zeroes"? Many feel they did and that it's a great way to embrace online social networking. Click link to read the TV Squad article.

maxon 3d reel

2007-03-07T11:02:00.000-08:00

Pretty nice stuff, if you are into that kind of crap.

lovin' that nokia

2007-03-07T10:34:00.000-08:00

pretty pretty pretty.

It's your, er, CS3 in a box...

2007-03-06T12:44:00.000-08:00

A rather unfortunate choice for the campaign for the new Adobe Creative Suite. But a pretty nice and tactile experience on that box...

airchive

2007-03-05T10:48:00.000-08:00

miles and miles of air-related ephemera...

ads you probably won't see

2007-03-02T13:08:00.000-08:00

Red vs. Green - new Snickers TV

2007-03-02T09:27:00.000-08:00

Suitcase alternative

2007-02-28T09:21:00.000-08:00

This has been around for awhile, but I've finally ditched Suitcase in favor of this elegant and FREE solution. Yes, free.

So far, so good. Much more intuitive and stable than Suitcase has been for me. (knock on wood)

chair, extraordinaire.

2007-02-26T12:52:00.000-08:00

because wikis are all the rage...

2007-02-22T15:09:00.000-08:00

And because it's a great idea. Need to find a resource relation to the motion graphics industry? Go to MographWiki. Have something to share about the motion graphics industry? Go to MographWiki.

because I can.

2007-02-22T14:57:00.000-08:00

And because there is actually a Flickr Group dedicated to In-n-Out Burger. Stumbled upon randomly...

sometimes simple is better. or good. or something.

2007-02-16T16:27:00.000-08:00

Playin' da game

2007-02-15T11:05:00.000-08:00

Release the Freaks!

2007-02-13T12:28:00.000-08:00

The kick-ass book publisher, Die Gestalten, has opened an equally kick-ass online toy store. An example (from the product description of the lovely object on the left): His smile may remind you of smiley but his body resembles a mound of human excrement.

Silent City ready for download

2007-02-13T07:06:00.000-08:00

Ruairi Robinson made a really great movie called Silent City™, and he decided to share it with everybody in the universe... go watch it. And while you are there, read some of his posts. He has a pretty good sense of self effacing humor, like:

"As a side note, umm... it's become increasingly apparent to me that despite the crap I write on this website, which unless you (yeah, you. No not you -- you.) are fucking retarded will realise is mostly a joke, that I'm not actually very good at hyping myself up, and have occasionally lost jobs to people whose work is crap because I haven't promised bullshit I can't deliver. There are people who can walk into a room, and tell clients exactly what they want to hear just to get the job, then deliver mediocre shit. I'm not one of those people. And I can't stand buzzwords.

So this current paragraph is designed to change all that. So brace yourself for the EDGIEST, GRITTIEST most cutting edge film YOU HAVE EVER SEEN, it will blow your mind! It pushes the envelope so hard it will give your boner a boner! It's so gritty and edgy, it actually takes "it" to the next level, even though nobody has ever, ever figured what "it" is before. Well I have! the "IT" we've all been talking about for years is MY FILM! It's so amazing it will refinance your home, enlarge your penis AND save the Whales. It's THAT good.

Now about that commercial. Did I mention I'm available to direct? The set will contain small traces of grit, and there will be visible edges on it. Any scenes shot in an elevator, I will personally take the crew up to the next vertical level and shoot the scene there instead. I will place envelopes on the set so that I can push them around with my bare hands. I'm even willing to cut the edges off those envelopes! Cuz that's just how I roll. Alternately just tell me what you want to hear, and I'll say that instead. Are we in synergy?

sold/out."